Starved

Seen so many faces,

so many eyes,

and so many smiles.

But yours, honey,

yours seem to be carved in my mind,

replaying themselves between dreams.

And I wish, oh, I wish so bad

that you would smile more for me.

Fear and pain are tasty, but not yours, not yours.

However, blood's a different story,

yours seems to be the only one I would drink.

Helplessly lost in a frenzy of hunger,

yours, I would devour.

 Such a strange sensation when the reality matches what you've pictured in your mind so precisely. 

 I just want to close my eyes and stop thinking for a while.

Coax me

Ayer me reí tanto que el universo desapareció ante mis ojos y solo éramos nosotros tomando té y recordando nuestros tiempos de colegio, como si nada estuviera mal, como si todo fuera perfecto y tuviéramos todo el tiempo del mundo.
Y entonces pensé en lo bonito que sería que me hicieras reír de la misma manera. 

Psss

 It's not rocket science darling, just show me that you will kill and die for me.

Another dream

My fingers were lost between his,
pressing me down on the mattress and stealing short breaths of death.
I was helpless, lost in a dance that I cannot name,
embracing the moon and dancing on her edges.

My neck was stretched to its full length,
the pain as intense as the pleasure,
bringing tears to my eyes,
tears filled with yearning.

The noises that escaped my throat were too weak to be heard,
but your breath near my ear intensified my longing.
Shivers ran down my spine, and I went numb for a moment,
trying to say your name but holding it back because it was so forbidden.

I needed to bite you, I had to do it, I must
taste your flesh, taste your blood,
make you mine,
and make you wince in pain.

I am what I am, and you have left me starved.

Sick

Curiosamente, y como funciona el destino. Me habló ayer en la noche para preguntarme como estaba, que había soñado conmigo. Y por momentos quise decirle que estaba todo mal y que solo quería estar entre sus brazos toda la noche y que hiciera lo que quisiera conmigo. Pero gracias al rey demonio que solo fue un pensamiento de milisegundos, no alcancé ni a poner el dedo en las letras, agradezco también mi falta de impulsividad.
No olvido lo mal que me porté, lo mal que se portó, y el daño que nos hicimos. Incluso si nunca estuvimos juntos 'juntos', nunca le pusimos nombre. Aún así me da risa el hecho de que revolotea cada cierto tiempo en mi orbita. casi queriendo que no le olvide, que por ningún motivo vaya a hacerlo, ¿Qué tan tóxico es eso? ¿Debería bloquearlo o sólo lo dejo alimentar mi ego?
El tema es que no había pensado en él desde diciembre, que fue cuando me dijo feliz navidad. Simplemente ahora me encontró vulnerable, y la verdad si necesito nanais, pero no de él, nada de él. 

 Estoy enojadaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

A Little hope

Can I talk about you?

Can I give myself the permission to name you?

Can I allow myself to dream?

Cause I'm scared as fuck.

But I'm thinking a lot about you,

And all our interactions seem to be playing in my head like a record,

rolling in my memories.

Is there a possibility that this goes the right way?

Or was it doomed since the beginning?

I'm still swimming in doubts, but I don't wanna drown.
If it's not by your hands on my neck, I don't wanna choke.

But you seem so amazed by me, is it true?
Does my little me bewitch someone like you?

If someone had told me that we would achieve this kind of closeness, I wouldn't have believed it.

Be true, that's all that I'm asking, because I'm being really honest, and I don't want to hide or fake anything.

I don't wanna be hurt, but I don't wanna stay with that annoying 'if' between my lips.

Make me feel, because I thought that I didn't have feelings for anyone anymore.

It turns out that I was so mistaken.

God, give me this, only this, this little moment, this sporadic nothing, that could become more.

U are not the driver anymore

It embarrasses me now,
it actually makes me cringe if I think about it.

The fact that I was so devoted to you,
that you could have molded me into anything you desired,
asked anything of me,
had me on my knees for you,
grabbed my hair,
choked me,
broke my arm,
or pulled my legs or all of my strings.

There was a moment that I didn't have a will of my own,
but you were my will.
Yes, it is embarrassing,
was it love?
Was my perception of my love for you so mistaken?

Or was it more like a dog,
like a slave to his master,
I don't know.

But what I do know,
is that I will never want to feel like that again,
so powerless in my own actions,
so little,
so nothing.