A Little hope

Can I talk about you?

Can I give myself the permission to name you?

Can I allow myself to dream?

Cause I'm scared as fuck.

But I'm thinking a lot about you,

And all our interactions seem to be playing in my head like a record,

rolling in my memories.

Is there a possibility that this goes the right way?

Or was it doomed since the beginning?

I'm still swimming in doubts, but I don't wanna drown.
If it's not by your hands on my neck, I don't wanna choke.

But you seem so amazed by me, is it true?
Does my little me bewitch someone like you?

If someone had told me that we would achieve this kind of closeness, I wouldn't have believed it.

Be true, that's all that I'm asking, because I'm being really honest, and I don't want to hide or fake anything.

I don't wanna be hurt, but I don't wanna stay with that annoying 'if' between my lips.

Make me feel, because I thought that I didn't have feelings for anyone anymore.

It turns out that I was so mistaken.

God, give me this, only this, this little moment, this sporadic nothing, that could become more.

U are not the driver anymore

It embarrasses me now,
it actually makes me cringe if I think about it.

The fact that I was so devoted to you,
that you could have molded me into anything you desired,
asked anything of me,
had me on my knees for you,
grabbed my hair,
choked me,
broke my arm,
or pulled my legs or all of my strings.

There was a moment that I didn't have a will of my own,
but you were my will.
Yes, it is embarrassing,
was it love?
Was my perception of my love for you so mistaken?

Or was it more like a dog,
like a slave to his master,
I don't know.

But what I do know,
is that I will never want to feel like that again,
so powerless in my own actions,
so little,
so nothing.

Feeling high

I've seen so many moons,

swam in so many oceans,

burned with many suns,

And I've always left my door open,

patiently awaiting your arrival.

I've walked many paths,

run on so many streets,

slept enveloped in your memory,

mouth open,

waiting for my words to emerge.

Today, I've left behind all the longings of what could have been,

shedding all traces of memories,

even when I thought it was for eternity.

The cards showed me

that even though mourning is a process like a roller coaster,

today, I'm feeling so high

that I can no longer see anyone by my side.

After all this time?

I think I'm going to **** you until the end of time,

when my voice has lost its tone,

when my legs have no more strength,

when my eyes can no longer see,

and my arms can no longer reach you.

I think I'm going to cherish you in my memories,

when no one meets my standards,

when no other person can dry my tears like you,

when no one else can make me forget,

because after all these years, you are still the one I long for.

I think I'm going to keep all my words,

and I'm going to preserve all my truth,

I'll try not to blame or mistreat myself,

I'll try not to hurt myself,

thinking about how I wasn't enough for you.

To think that maybe if I were skinnier, prettier, funnier,

you would have stayed.

You would have fought,

because I couldn't fight alone...

 He estado en shock desde el Lunes, de verdad no podrías caer más bajo ante mis ojos. 

Honey, are you coming?

My bad reputation precedes me,

they say I play games,
that I'm not sincere,
that I'm cold and escape commitment,

oh well, I can't say otherwise.

But I always warned you to turn around,

because it's always frozen here,

It's July every day.

Just like my frozen hands on your neck,

choking you with my words,

drowning you in your hopes.

The more you try to reach for heaven,

the more I'll drag you to hell,

the more you try to take my hands,

the more I'll push you away,

and if you dare to even think of a future,

oh well, prepare yourself to be deceived.

You can't defeat what I am,

nor try to change me,

what I am, I have decided,

and I have decided to not forget what I am.

Come

I've been waiting for you to call my name, only God knows how long I've been waiting. Even when the sounds stop buzzing in my ear and the sun goes down, I still feel like listening to your voice.

I cast a spell far away from the places where we have been, so nothing will remain — not a picture of you or me, none to speak about each other. Only the moon will remember stares that we shared.

But in these nights of lonely bliss, I still wait for you to come to me. So come.

Choke

Me vendiste tus pecados como errores,
mientras yo susurraba plegarias en tu nombre,
queriendo creerte tan inocente,
figurabas en una lista como el primer culpable.

El sol era mi enemigo,
y tu te regocijabas bailando en sus rayos,
desde las sombras te ignoraba,
pero venías por mi,
jalándome más hacia ti,
dejándote consumir por el frio de mis manos.

El deseo era solo tu excusa para abusar de mi paciencia,
para culparme por palabras dichas,
por actos cometidos sin segundas intenciones.
Pero te pregunto,
a pesar de todas las que buscas,
de todas las que quieres,
¿por qué sigues durmiendo solo? 

Christmas wishes

It's not rocket science, I just wanna fuck him.

Battle scars

Sitting by the shore, watching the hurricane,
It had to decide whether to descend or rise,
Whether to swim or remain still.

There was no full moon,
And the wind scattered its tears across the sand,
Painfully touching its shoulder,
Screaming in its ear to run.

Breathing became difficult—shallow and fast.
It tried to fill its broken lungs through its mouth,
But ashes gathered in its throat,
Like a whirl of black dust.

Anguish, invisible and violent,
Pounded its chest and nestled behind its eyes.
How lucky are those who do not fly,
How lucky are those who do not remember.

And night after night,
Step by step,
It drowns its demons
In flames of sighs.